"if only..." and "...not fair"

The discussion of today included acceptance of reality and not pining for a better life (plan it, work it, achieve it or regroup and try again). This reminded me of a situation with my kids...

I have been telling my kids, in response to "that's not fair", that "life's not fair, get used to it" for their entire lives. It became a "dad mantra", complete with rolling eyes and big sighs. I realized that the explanation I planned to give them "when they were older" had never been given. I explained to them that we lived in a great country, and a very wealthy country. Beyond that, we made well over average money and had lots of toys, books, electronics and other stuff. We have many freedoms that many other countries don't have. Then I lowered the boom. If life were fair, you wouldn't have any of this. If life were fair, everyone would be the same - EXACTLY the same. You'd live in what we would call a shack, with one bathroom, few toys, shared bedrooms, one car (if we were lucky), and you would most likely have already had to face the death of a friend due to disease or lack of medical care, etc... Suddenly their little world was a bit larger, and they understood a little better, just how blessed they were. And how unfair life *really* was.

What had they (or I done, for that matter) that was so great as to be in proportion to the lives we get to lead? Conversely what have the rest of the people done that leaves them in the situations they are in? It was a short conversation, but they were visibly moved. They still don't have any idea of the magnitude, but they have a grasp of the situation.

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